Two posts about the same idea….
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< This is from my blog entry today>

February 27, 2010
New York, NY
Home came to an end when I was 9 years old.
Home came to an end again a year and a half after.
I escaped home days after I turned 18.
Home has always been transient and mythical; constantly shape shifting and slipping out from my grasp. I cannot recount all the moments in which I have been lured into thinking that this place, this moment, YOU, is HOME. Then it shifts again and I am back in search of it. I have always felt that I am home in search of HOME, trying to find my way back to that mythical place once again.
We associate home with the trappings of Cable TV, Internet connection, running water, the first cup of coffee in your favorite mug, the smell of warmth lingering on your duvet and the bone crushing hug from someone who loves you. I have been shifting out of this mind set and trying to understand HOME is not a physical reference to a specific place but a state of mind, a boardening of the consciousness. Home is where I am. This has been a slow and difficult process.
Over 13 months ago I left a home that I had spent 6 years building with someone I loved. I have spent the entire year couch surfing from one friend’s house to another, bed hopping from hostels to hostels.
In the span of 398 days there has been 27 flights, 160+ of long distance bus ride, 7 Countries, too much Tequila and Rum, endless hours spent talking to myself, countless friends who have extended their love and support and learned that a life time can be condensed to 432 cubic feet of space.
YOU. My darling YOU.
I lay my head on your chest and listen to the space between your heart beat and I am home. Yet I know that this feeling is not just you and only you. I have felt this way before; with a different heart beneath, with another set of arms around me. Experience tells me that I will again be home, with you, with another you.
Charles Dickens said that “Home is a name, a word. It is a strong one; stronger than magician ever spoke or spirits ever answered to, in the strongest conjuration.” After a life time of searching, I have treaded the golden brick road and finally release the need for HOME to be an actual place, let go of any preconceptions and whispered the whispered the magic incantation.
I am HOME.
< This is from “Fetal Position and Drool> which is a photo album on my FB >
I started taking pictures of beds I am sleeping in on a lark. At first it had to do with the events of this year and that I have not had a “HOME” of my own since January. Then as I thought more and more about it I come to realize even before this year, my work and my wonderings have taken me to many places and I have laid my head down in many strange beds, from hotels to hostels to hammocks to sleeping bag in a tent. Is HOME where we lay our head at night? Is HOME where we allow ourselves to dream and feel safe? What is HOME to you? These beds may not be HOME in the ultimate sense but they at least allowed me to curl up and dream and maybe even drool a little.
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Can we please have a conversation about the concept of HOME?
Its part of a bigger project that I am trying to tackle….






firstly, i LOVE your bed pictures. I selfishly want you to remain in search of a home so that you can continue with these fascinating pictures. Literally, I look at my bed differently now. And I have been sleeping in this bed with my husband and my kids who sneak in in the middle of the night, for nine years. Same bed. Every once in awhile we will buy new sheets, but never a pair. So it is always mismatched.
Nisan left the kibbutz today, and is on his way to WA State. We are in search of a new home. The kids and I will follow in Aug. The Kibbutz and Israel has been my home for almost a decade. Now I am leaving. I feel like I am betraying something. Like this is my home. This country. I came here at 18 with nothing but faith. But then being at VSC, I though maybe this is also home. Maybe I can bring my ideals here as well. And I keep saying “we will come back to Israel, to our home”.
My immidiate family is all over the place. My dad in MN, my sister in Brooklyn, My brothers and my mom in Boston. I have never had that oh-i’m-going-HOME-for-the-holidays! And I always wanted it! Now having my own family I really want to give my kids that. For along time I thought it meant staying forever in the house that they grew up in. Keeping their childhood bedrooms exactly the same.
It used to creep me out, how each time my mom moved she would recreate her other houses. Now I love that about her. This transience, this placing of things in ways that remind you of Home. I also believe that for my kids, the four of us is home. Whereever we will be. That opening of conversation, of arms. I think like the saying Family is what you make it, Home is where you make it.
here are some thoughts that are in additions to:
The study of nomads. They carry their home with them. Aleister Crowley suggested weaving prayer/meditation rugs that incorporated all the important symbology of one’s personal temple, so that whereever you went, you’d have it with you.
Then this morning’s NYT about China elevating their choice of Panchan Lama and of course it mentions how the Dali Lama has been in exile since 1959. The difference between our sense of HOME and something much larger as such as the spiritual HOME to the likes of the Dali Lama.
Is there a division / separation between the spiritual home and HOME? I know that for some of us there isn’t and while for others there is a huge difference.
Another interesting thing about all of these pictures of beds is that I am essentially trying to see how I can take pictures of the same thing over and over again, not just the same subject matter, but essentially a bed (for the most part) and make it a little different and finding new ways to do it. This in is self is of interest and would love feedbacks / random musing on if possible.
Tove, I love the image of your bed with your husband and children and all the mismatched sheets and pillowcases and etc. I love how your mom would recreate her other houses every time she moved. Home is ultimately where ever we are at and what we make it. Yet we continue to associate it with a place. Anyone would care to venture a guess on why that is?
I grew up knowing the house that my grandmother and grandfather bought and built on in 1947. I wasn’t born there, but my grandmother lived in the home until we moved in when I was 6. This is the HOME I have come to every year for thanksgiving. I am now living in that home, and sleeping in my Grandmother’s old bedroom. The house sits plopped atop a hill and looks down upon a valley. My sisters and I swear by this territory and would die defending it. Somehow it is not just home, but a spiritual sanctuary. I grew up running through tick-infested deer trails and finding hidden coves in bushes. I consider this plot of land to be my personal church. I did a painting about it once: it pertained to the question of what is home? Is it the spiritual guide that raises you? Which would explain the comfort of a church or practice, the familiarity of belief, or iconography. Or is it the physical place? The feeling of standing somewhere you have stood before? An then there is just that one mug you love in the morning….
I was watching a video about an installation in Paris by artist JR where he pasted large images of womens’ eyes all around the city, covering bridges etc… A woman commented on it, expressed her love of it and its beauty, and then expressed her desire for it to ” be up long enough for me to at least not notice it anymore”. Maybe home is accepted and familiar beauty. Something we cherish that we are allowed to take for granted. When we are away from it we miss it, when we are near it we hardly notice after 3 days time.
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